Warning: This post is far from beautiful and not quite elegant. Know that this is the story of a heart that is broken, but also the story of a Redeeming Father. Sometimes I am kept awake to write because that is the most still moment, and I am completely okay with that! Life is often full of constant battles. Maybe you have experienced so many wounds from gunshots that it leaves you lost. Even if you are not experiencing the hurt first hand, I am sure you have heard the shots and it has left your ears ringing. There is something so eerie about battles that we all are facing that makes us feel nauseous. At times, the wounds have gone so deep, but we try to patch them up before anyone sees. I bet there are times when you hear gunfire around you aimed at others, but you are too lost in your pain to give much attention outward. Perhaps we are too ashamed to admit the wounds we have and the brokenness we feel. Maybe you have far more wounds than you ever imagined, and you do not want to feel weak because of them. Dear readers, we are fighting serious battles. This is not how God intended life to be lived. We were not made for any of this, and it is breaking His heart to see us in the shape we are. Dear readers, what are your wounds? Perhaps its hurt, bitterness, anger, hatred, anxiety, depression, sin, or trials. The hard things about battle is these wounds can also be easily infected the more you cover them and carry on. You were not created for this, Christ created you for so much more. My readers, I have felt so broken from pains of the past and they are only adding up. They are stacking high and I figured battles were a way of life. This is not the truth, but only a deception from the enemy. I was casually reading Philippians 1 this week and verse 20b stopped me in my tracks, "Christ will be glorified in my body, either by life, or by death." Paul was so committed to Christ that he promised to remain firm, even in the face of death. Wow. We are living in a time where there are so many roaring battles. I'm weary and I am nauseous, both in my own battles, and hearing from those I love about their battles. Listen closely, my Sweet Jesus offers peace for us. He sees you, and He has not forgotten you. He hears you call and He is reaching to embrace you. Lay it down at His feet. Whatever it is that seems to be lingering in your heart, mind, and life, lay it down. I know, it's so heavy, yet so hard to release. The Redeemer is only asking you to lay it down and to enter into His warm embrace. God is not asking for a joyful hallelujah at all times. In fact, some of the most beautiful hallelujahs are the ones that require you to unclench your jaw, wipe your tears, life up your head, then whisper, "God be praised." Oh, how beautiful are the shattered and broken hallelujahs. Know that in all things, He will prevail. Lean on Him, all you who are weary. If there is one thing I have learned in life, it is that Jesus' love and grace prevail for His children. He will fight for you, you need only to Be still (Exodus 14:14) “The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.” Psalms 34:18
