Almost daily, I find my mind wandering to my hypothetical future. I spend a lot of time planning what my first home will look like-my quiet, quaint, earthy, modern farmhouse. I imagine having a sweet little golden retriever that becomes a part of the family and grows up in the love and comfort on my quaint home. But above all this, daily, I imagine being a mom. From the time I could walk and talk, I always wanted to play “house” and I made sure I was always the mother. Even my grown-up mind cannot help but think of the day I will have children of my own that I can raise to be servants of Christ and lovers of people. I nanny for a living, which gives me an evening’s dose of being a mom. I see the daily hardships, joys, struggles, and goals of working with these children. I love my job and I love being able to help these children grow into respectable young people, but my mind is constantly set on those children that will be my own.
Modeling children
A couple days ago, I was having a nightly chat with my boyfriend. A lot of the words that were coming from my mouth were pure anxiety, stress, fear, and doubt. At one point, I stopped to let my boyfriend talk while I tried to gather my restless thoughts. His words were tender, yet cunning as he began to reflect on all I had just told him. This is what he said to me, “Jer... You know how you are always thinking about your children that you will have, and you constantly talk about how you want to give them the love and nurture they deserve? How are you going to do that if anxiety is always telling you how to live? Your children are going to watch you, and after a while, they will develop the same characteristics. What do you want them to be like?” Snap... he got me there. I am a Psychology major specializing in children and adolescent counseling, I know the ins and outs of children modeling and mirroring. Why did I never think of this before? The lifestyle I chase today and the person I am today will affect my tomorrow. Truly, dear readers, I am faced with the choice to live a life of purpose or a life of anxious restlessness. No one would choose this life for their child, therefore I need to become the example I aim to be in the future. Children easily pick up habits of their care-givers. Of course every child develops due to their nature and their nurture provided, but the nurturing aspect often affects children more than we think.
What I truly adore about children is their want to learn and grow. Children typically ask questions to learn, and they take in information from their environments in order to grow. Perhaps this is why Jesus Christ wanted the children to come to Him. Just as children model after their care-givers, we adults must model after Christ. He is calling us to come to Him as children, wanting to learn and grow in truth.
Modeling Yourself After The Savior
Truly, raising children is a three-step trickle effect-Christ shapes us in a way that is pleasing unto Him, we live in the way of light and love that Christ shows us, and then our children will eventually begin to walk in light and love. Proverbs 22:6 states, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Now notice, it says in the way he should go. Not all children will walk in the way of the upright, but as long as they are raised to do so, the parent can most certainly be rewarded. Most often, those parents who raise their children to be upright will indeed enjoy the fruits of their labor once the child reaches adulthood. For those who are struggling with rebellious spirits in their children may not be at fault, but it is still their duty to continue to reward, discipline, and correct according to godly example. The choice will be the child’s in the end, but as parents, there is a constant calling in Scripture to guide the children in the way of righteousness. In order to do this, we must model our precious Savior-the way He loves, forgives, teaches, corrects, guides, and leads by example. Anxious living is not the way that my Jesus created me to live, in fact, He created me for much more than this. I love Philippians 4:6, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” Paul used this verse to call the anxious in heart to turn worry into prayer, fervent prayer, and thanksgiving. You see, if we turn our human nature and responses into things that benefit the Kingdom, we can turn ourselves into stewards of Christ rather than people of the flesh. As my boyfriend often states, “If you do not feel strong enough to do it for yourself right now, do it for Christ and those who love you,”
Others Are Watching You
Your life is a testimony, whether it is a good one or a not-so-great one. Others see what kind of message you are giving through your lifestyle, words, actions, habits, and choices. If you do not have children yet, or even if you do, remember that there are eyes on you. Whether your life will guide them to model you or learn from you, your life is more important than you think. Sweet reader, I beg you to shape your life in the richness of Christ’s love. I want His love to be our testimonies-pure, selfless, no strings attached, genuine, deep, and constant. May we shape ourselves just as children do, after the example of our Heavenly Father.
Isaiah 55:9 states, "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts." May our thoughts and ways be like Christ. May we trust Him to lead our ways in righteousness. Lastly, may we take His yoke upon us daily to follow His ways in order to be shaped like Him.
